In my time working at Armchair Psychology, it has become evident to me that each of the Psychologist team members have varied and valuable skill sets.  No one person can claim to know everything about everything, so it is helpful for me to know that wherever I might be stuck on something, or not sure how to best help a client, that there is another Psychologist available to lend an ear and share their knowledge with me.

We have found our weekly team meetings to be a supportive space in which we can share what we’re stuck on.  We always make sure we de-identify any information, so that we honour our commitment to client confidentiality.  We tend to talk about themes, psychological techniques, or other specific services, and not information about a client’s life that would compromise confidentiality or respect.  Psychologists have an obligation to ensure that we attend “supervision” with other Psychologists to keep up to date on best practice, and continue our learning.  Given the benefit of talking through things with my colleagues, I am reminded of the importance and requirement of doing this to maintain registration as Psychologists.

We also find that the team meetings are a space where we can feel safe and valued in sharing our knowledge where appropriate.  This process of give and take helps us develop our psychological skill sets, and feel part of a friendly, supportive, knowledgeable team.

If you would like some helpful tips and feel like it is lacking in your workplace and would like support, reach out!

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/working-as-a-team/

The psychology team at Armchair Psychology Practice talk a lot about the issues that affect our clients. The one that is overwhelmingly at play is grief – in all its forms.  Whether there has been a death of a loved one, or someone we love is dying; whether chronic illness or disability has changed the way life will be; whether a relationship is ending or has come to an end – even children going through life’s stages and moving away from parents – grief is a natural response.

The foremost thought is always, though, if grief is so common, felt by us all, and is so natural, why do we find it so hard to deal with? Why do we find it so hard to reach out and take comfort, to accept the help offered? And, conversely, how is it possible to see someone grieving and yet walk away?  Our worlds have got too busy, people are too isolated. Psychologists know that the best way to deal with grief is to talk about it, to cry, to shout, to mourn. It is a shame that the common wisdom is that we should “Soldier on”, even when that is the worst thing to do. Grieving is NOT the same as wallowing (and so what if it is, it is necessary!)

The problem with grief is that it makes us stop.  It takes over and insists that we deal with the feelings. Many people try really hard not to allow grief to interfere with their ongoing life tasks.  They think they are being strong when they push them away, or take medication to stop the feelings and allow themselves to sleep. Psychologists know that that just doesn’t work in the longterm.  We might feel better when we avoid the feelings, but grief has a way of catching up with us and forcing us to face our losses.

The people whom we see in our practice are sometimes those who know they need to talk and to be sad, and find ours a safe place to do that.  Often, they are finding it hard to get on with everyday life because they are so sad, and don’t know how to take the time for themselves to grieve. Then there’s the other group – the complicated grief – people suffering emotionally and being so distant from the loss that they sometimes are not even aware of why they feel so terrible. Then our work as psychologists is to carefully, sensitively, help them face the grief of the loss.  Once they reconnect with all the feelings they have pushed down hard, they will discover their tears and then be free to move forward in their lives.

When you allow yourself to mourn, you can keep hold of your loved one in your heart, and continue on in life, being functional and okay.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/our-project-on-grief/

Yesterday I did one of my favourite things – live radio! I was on SBS Radio, in their Artarmon studios, and responded to listeners’ questions about the range of issues  that challenge us as we get older.  Depression was obviously a common theme – whether it was triggered by downsizing, retirement, missing one’s childhood home and family, facing the death of parents, or the illness of friends. You can listen to the full podcast here: http://www.sbs.com.au/yourlanguage/hebrew/en/content/amanda-gordon-clinical-psychologist-sbs-about-life-after-50-2042017. Don’t worry, it’s all in English!

You can also go to our Armchair Psychology Facebook page, where I have posted the video stream of (most of) the interview – there were a few early technical hitches.  That’s actually part of why I love live radio.  I had to wing it, while Nitza Lowenstein, the presenter of the programme, fixed the recording device. It was distracting, but I could be a “true radio professional” and carry on regardless.

I am always hopeful that, while I respond to specific concerns of individual listeners, I am assisting people change their thinking in their own lives.  That’s why I give general rather that personal responses. Do let me know if any of my words struck true to you, or made a difference to the way you look at things.  You can comment on the Facebook page if yo

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/life-after-50/

With the prevalence of social media, online bullying and trolling has unfortunately become more present than ever. Kids can no longer escape the school yard bullies in the sanctuary of their own homes, with the online world making it easier and more accessible for vulnerable kids to be targeted. For this reason, it is important that we give kids the skills to manage social situations.  These skills include listening to others, communicating their needs without whining, deciding when to put up and shut up, asserting discomfort in a situation (if it occurs) and waiting their turn in a game. They initially learn through engaging with their parents and siblings and extended family, then through family friends.  They then take what they have learned to childcare, preschool, then school and gradually into other social situations. All along the way, it is important that we model appropriate social behaviour, show them when they are not behaving properly (either victimising or being victims, not sharing or tantruming) in social situations.

Just like adults, kids are going to encounter other kids they don’t particularly get along with – and may potentially have issues with. It’s important we teach children skills that they can use to handle and manage difficult situations. We also have to help them build resilience, instead of solving their problems for them. We want them to cope in a world when they won’t always get their way. Listed below are five key tips on building resilience in kids:

1. Pay attention to them – as parents we must really listen to what our children say to us, when they come to us for advice or just to be an ear and lend support. They are then more likely to really listen to others as well.
2. Give them real feedback –  rather than telling them ‘things will be okay’, it’s important to be honest and tell them when things are not okay or where they need to improve.
3. Give them opportunities to have a disagreement with siblings or friends – while our instinct is always to protect our kids, it’s important that we don’t always step in and solve problems for them.
4. Allow them to be upset – it’s important that kids know their feelings are valid – let them be hurt/upset and then assist them to develop strategies to manage and rectify the situation.
5. Be a good role model – kids need to see parents showing emotion too and having bad days, that way kids can see parents confronting the hurt and sorting it out.

Why do kids bully?

There are two sides to every equation and it’s crucial that we understand bullying from the other side. So, why do kids bully? Parents are often faced with the question – ‘but why is he/she mean to me’, ‘what did I do’ etc. It’s important for kids to know that in many cases the child who is being targeted has done nothing wrong.  The best thing I have ever taught kids is that “bullies must be pretty unhappy to want to make you unhappy.  Perhaps you could help them connect with their real feelings”.  Most kids don’t want to be bullies and would prefer to have real friendships – but they don’t always know how. Kids more likely to be bullies are those who feel neglected or unappreciated by others, or those with low self-esteem. Sometimes they then want others to feel worse than they do. In addition, kids who always get their own way at home, may expect everyone else to give way to their demands. Kids who have parents who bully them, don’t learn alternative ways to engage with others, and often repeat the pattern in social situations. Listed below are some practical tips for kids dealing with bullying  across different circumstances.

Tips for dealing with bullying for primary school children

1. Remind them they should seek help from an adult.
2. Encourage them to play with other friends.
3. Have non-bullying children over on play-dates
4. Have the children play in front of the parent, rather than hidden away – parents must model assertive, non-bullying, but not victim behaviour either, when intervening.

For adolescents/high school aged

1. Make yourself available so they can share their distress.
2. Encourage a diversity of friends.
3. Support your child in behaviours that are non-conforming, if that’s what they want.
4. Ensure the child has good hygiene.
5. Talk generally about social issues, difficulties you may have had “some people etc …” to give your child a sense of not being alone.
6. If you are really worried your adolescent is being bullied, talk quietly to teacher/school counsellor/ child’s best friend. Enact safety measures.

How does being bullied affect a child’s mental health and well-being

Now that we’ve looked at bullying from the most significant perspectives, it’s important to understand the burden of bullying upon a child’s mental health and well-being.  Children can exhibit a range of emotional responses.  Some withdraw. Others (especially younger ones) regress. Anxiety may appear, but not necessarily related to social situations. Young children may not want to go to birthday parties; older ones may withdraw from group activities.  Depression is not always identifiable as being anything other than adolescent behaviour, so it’s tough. If your adolescent becomes overly moody, withdrawn, unsociable, it may be worth checking in with their best friend confidentially for confirmation as to whether this is aimed just at the family. In older kids, self-harm and even suicide can be the outcome of bullying.

Parenting is not always easy and we don’t always feel the rewards immediately.  It can be hard to watch our child struggle with difficult social interactions. Sometimes, our children don’t want us to interfere and we have to make judgement calls. The trick is to remind ourselves of our goal of building healthy, happy, effective, independent adults.  Then we can put in the hard work of watching our children struggle and supporting them to make healthy decisions, rather than jumping in quickly.  When we do that, they will not tolerate being bullied, and won’t bully anyone else.  They will feel good in their own skin – and you’ll have been the best you can be as a parent. If you’re looking to speak to someone further, click the link to get in touch.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/kids-bullying/

Many people tell me that they would prefer the label “Stressful” to “Silly” for the current season. What can you do to survive it?

There is an urgency in the air. So much to do, so many people to see, so little time – and often, a great reluctance to do it. Buying presents, often for people whom you see rarely of perhaps don’t particularly care for, can put a big hole in your budget. Preparing for a holiday, when these extra tasks are also to be done, can put a big hole in your time. Having to get everything done can lead to irritability – with your partner, workmates, children – and that means shame, it means extra work to mend relationships, and it can mean extra tension when you just need a break.

This is also party season, which carries with it its own dangers. What can you do to survive it?

1. Continue your normal exercise routine or replace it with something different. Don’t just assume that dancing at parties will be enough. The best protector of mental health is sensible physical exercise.
2. Alcohol is only your friend when used in moderation. When you drink, you increase your reactivity and irritability, and can really muck up important relationships. Ensure you have alcohol-free days, and that when you are drinking, you intersperse alcoholic drinks with non-alcoholic, so that you quench your thirst sensibly and only sip on your alcohol. This will be of major benefit in helping you survive silly season.
3. Take time for yourself if you can. Perhaps put away your screen in the evening and instead have a relaxing shower, do some yoga or breathing, sit quietly without stimulation. Or go for a gentle walk.
4. Keep an eye on your significant relationships and make time for them too. Don’t put them on hold while you spend your time partying or shopping. Do some of it together.
5. When spending time with difficult family members (often those you have avoided during the year but have to spend time with at Christmas), keep the topic of conversation simple and non-controversial. If you are mindful of what is going on, you can keep things gently on track and avoid minefields. Being sober will help that process.
6. Sleep helps us manage our emotions. Ensure you have enough. Burning the candle at both ends may not lead you to greater happiness.
7. Write lists and cross tasks off when they are completed. It will give you a real sense of satisfaction and will also make you more efficient, leaving you more time to enjoy this very silly season.

Have a wonderful festive season and new year!

If you are feeling overwhelmed or anxious at this time of year please get in touch for further support.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/how-to-survive-the-holiday-season/

New Year is almost always associated with New Year’s Resolutions. Many people wisely use this quieter time of the year to reflect on their lives and consider ways to enhance them in the coming year.  They then resolve to do things differently, or – less wisely – to aim for a particular outcome.

There is much evidence in the psychology literature for the benefits of self-reflection. Many of us don’t stop much during the year to think about life and our place in it, how we are travelling or what we would like our lives to be like.  So we decide to do this in anticipation of the new year.  This custom originated in colder climates, though, where people were forced inside around the fire, and had long dark nights suitable for reflection.  In the Australian summer, many of us make resolutions based on little other than a quick thought that “weight loss would be a good idea”, or “I need to exercise more”, without the consideration as to how those things would change our lives or even whether they are relevant changes to make.

Weighing up what has worked for you and what was problematic in the previous year can assist choices to change behaviour, so as to achieve different outcomes in the coming year. Without that reflection, unachievable goals are set in the guise of resolutions, and by mid-February many good intentions have well and truly come undone. However, if you really do believe, on proper reflection, that there are some things worth changing in your life, then here are seven things you can do to increase the likelihood of making those changes stick:

1. Ensure that you want to change in the way that you are about to resolve. You not only have to intend to change, you have to be motivated to make the change. That is, you can see some benefits that outweigh the effort you will have to expend to make this change. For example, you may like to lose some weight (the most common resolution made on and off Australian beaches this year). In order to do that, you will definitely have to change the way you eat and the way you exercise or expend energy.  Are you sure you want to do that?? It is all very well to want an outcome, but do you want to put in the work to make the outcome happen.  Making a resolution is not the same as wishing for an outcome.
2. Ensure that your resolution is about the behaviours or actions you will change, rather than being dependent on other people’s actions.
3. Ensure that your resolution is worded in a positive way i.e. resolve to do something rather than not do something. For example, resolve to eat a sensible diet rather than resolving to not eat certain fun foods.  Success has to come from what you do, because that is clear.  You can’t rack up a successful day from not eating a biscuit – rather, your day will be successful if you have had a balanced day of eating, even if the biscuit was included in the balance.  Resolutions to exclude things from your life that you enjoy are rarely kept.
4. Ensure that you word your resolution around measurable changes in behaviour that can be rewarded. For instance, if your resolution is to stop smoking cigarettes, then yo should resolve to do something else specific to your needs, whenever you feel the urge to smoke. As you are successful at behaviour change, reward yourself. For example, a reduction in the number of cigarettes smoked in a week could lead to a reward of the cost of a packet of cigarettes going into a slush fund for a future enjoyable activity.  Then every non-smoked cigarette is given extra credit for the money that is now available for another enjoyable (but healthy) activity. The accrual of funds in that account will help motivate you to find an activity other than smoking when you are stressed or bored.
5. Tell a friend about your intentions to change your behaviours and even see whether they would be prepared to join you in making those changes. There is good psychological evidence that behaviour change occurs best when people share common goals and work together towards them. Even if you don’t have someone who wants to make the same behaviour change as you do, find yourself a supporter, a coach, a cheerleader, from amongst your acquaintances, who will listen to you when you are finding it difficult and support your efforts, and who will cheer as you have success as you move towards change.
6. Recognise that you are only resolving to make change because you have been doing things that haven’t worked for you. However, they have become habits, and you will need to work hard to change your behaviours to be more effective in your life.  There will be obstacles – temptations to give up, triggers for your old maladaptive behaviours.  You need to plan for these obstacles and have some ideas about what you will do when you meet them.  For example, if you are resolved to reduce your alcohol intake, recognise what triggers led to excessive drinking in the past (perhaps a bad day at work or an argument with your partner). Assume you will still sometimes have a bad day or an argument and plan other behaviours in response. For instance, after a bad day at work, come home and change, and go out for a brisk walk.  Or phone a friend. Or have a relaxing bath.  Then reward yourself for avoiding that pitfall, by telling a friend or writing it down or just saying “well done” to yourself.
7. Remember, although the new year may be the time to reflect and make resolutions for the future, it is alright to work up to behaviour change. It is not a failure if you make some changes then revert for a while.  Once you have recognised that you can take charge of your own life and make changes that will work for you, it is practice and hard work that will make the changes the new way of life that will work for you, and help you life a more effective life.

If you are keen to resolve things for 2019 contact Armchair Psychology to see how we assist you define your resolutions and help incorporate real change into your life.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/7-keys-to-achieving-your-new-year-goals/

Balancing work and family is no easy feat. Our whole working world seem totally unprepared to be supporting working families. The overt message, through paid maternity leave, subsidised childcare, is that we value mothers in the workforce and want them back. However, women seem to be being asked to make a choice. After she returns to work from maternity leave, during which time her general exhaustion would have made her entirely useless to the workplace anyway, most employment practices then seem to expect the woman to get right back on the horse – ‘just keep working the way you did before the baby was in existence and we can all just pretend that nothing has changed’.

This message is meant to comfort the mother. It is in line with non-discriminatory practice. That is, everyone should be treated the same in the workplace and there should be no distinction between employees. But it really makes no sense. Once one is a parent, one is different. There are different responsibilities and work is now only one of the things that matters, and can never ever be entirely the priority ever again.

Yet I see employers who have wonderful family-friendly practices, yet the message is still clear – we have expectations that your output will not be diminished and that you will find a way to contribute, even when your mind is on your child.

It would be far healthier and more relevant to parents if there WAS workplace discrimination for parents. Workplaces should not be doing parents a favour by allowing them to have more flexible work hours or allowing them to work from home.

Workplaces who truly value families should see it as a matter of pride that parents are allowed to make their families the priority, and when they are calm and relaxed about the wellbeing of their children, their contribution to the workplace and their employers is likely to be even greater.

We have to encourage employers to be creative, in collaboration with the parents in their employ, to support rather than tolerate parents in raising their children. We know it takes a village – it is time that workplaces acknowledge their own membership in that village which is raising the children of their employees.

A happy worker will be more productive and creative – so everyone becomes a winner.

Contact us if you are struggling with the balance between your work and family life.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/balancing-work-and-family/

Grief and loss are strange creatures. I lost my mum just over a year ago, after a two year period during which she deteriorated such that she was rarely lucid, could not get out of bed, and seemed to spend the day in her own head, unable even to listen to music or watch a screen. It was tragic to see such a vibrant, intelligent, curious, active woman reduced to this.

Even though I knew she was never going to recover, and indeed that she had no quality of life at all, (except on those rare occasions when she responded to a visit by a grandchild or great grandchild and appeared to be joyful), her death hit me in unexpected ways. I kept functioning, did not become overwhelmed by sadness, but her absence was in my mind. She did visit me in dreams – not always kindly, though she seemed to be finding a way to have her say. There were times that I would have loved to share with her or to confide in her, and I still get a shock when I look in the mirror and see her there.

However, I’m writing this some fifteen months after her death. It is timely to reflect back, because over the last couple of months I’ve felt differently again. It is as if she was in my head all the time for three years, as I went about my daily business. I knew she was dying and then I knew she was dead. It wasn’t as if I was fooling myself. And now she’s still there, in my head, but in a less intrusive and non-distressing way. I have forgiven the way she treated me when she was ill – I had known that she didn’t mean it, but when she was alive it still hurt me when she was mean, as I was only doing my best to support her. It is only now, though, that I can think of that time and not be hurt. It makes it easier to bring her back into my thoughts, knowing that I can recall both the good and the bad times without falling in a heap. I can now identify with her again, without feeling undermined, and smile when I am told how much I look like her.

As a psychologist I have dedicated much of my career to supporting people who are grieving and am well aware of how everyone has to grieve in their own way. I know that it is a lonely business, even when we have people who love and support us. I have helped people tolerate themselves and their feelings, and supported them through the darkest times.

I have been blessed in my own life – to have never lost a loved one until now. I am a grandmother who until fifteen months ago had both my own parents, as well as my parents-in-law in my life. Yet as a psychologist, I am now even more blessed. I have been able to experience grief of my own and grow through the process, just as so many of the people I have worked with over the years have done. I am confirmed that we come through the tunnel and the sun feels warm on our skin again, the smiles and laughter become untarnished, yet we don’t forget. Our hearts have been broken and the scar remains. For me, it feels like I am in a new stage in my life, and the scar is a support now, rather than a pain.

If you want to speak to someone about the grief you are experiencing please get in touch.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/dealing-with-grief-and-loss/

Do you have a teen who is struggling with constant feelings of anxiety? For them the fear, worries, and overthinking just can’t seem to stop. Everything seems to be going wrong. There are overwhelming feelings of:

• What can I really do about it?
• Will I always be this way?
• I’m tired of people telling me to stop worrying, I mean it’s like I don’t want to stop, I just can’t.

They can feel like nobody really understands, or really cares.

“I just want this anxiety to stop. Stop sweating and shaking. I want to breathe and live normally. Just stop panicking. Play it cool,” they may say to themselves.

The reality is they’re not alone. Many adolescents and adults alike have lived with intense experiences of anxiety. In fact, around 1/14 young Australians have experienced an anxiety disorder.

They may be going through many changes at the moment which are very stressful. For example, friendship issues, completing assignments and exams, competitiveness, bullying, family conflict, feeling lonely, learning new skills (e.g. jobs, driving), making big decisions about their future, growing independence. It can be an extremely confusing and crazy time.
And that’s why we’re here. Know that anxiety and panic disorders are highly treatable. By engaging with a psychologist who is experienced in treating anxiety, you too, can leave the club you probably never wanted to join.

We’ve written some tips below for helping them manage the anxiety they may be experiencing. Some may be helpful for them, and some may not. It doesn’t hurt to give them a try.

Here we go:

Strategy 1: Know that it’s normal to feel anxious sometimes

Anxiety is in fact normal and adaptive. It motivates us, and helps us leap into action. For example, if there was a car who was about to run into you, your anxiety system will tell you to quickly run from danger. You don’t have time to weigh the pros and cons, you’ve just got to take quick action. This is an example of the flight response. Or let’s say you have a major exam coming up in a week. The anxiety would tell you that you need to study and be prepared, otherwise you’ll probably fail. And so you study and do relatively well for the exam. This is an example of the fight response. All human beings need to have their anxiety system working.

However, it’s when this system is constantly overactivated with the fight or flight response even when there’s no real danger out there. It’s when the anxiety interferes with your quality of life in a negative way, such that you can’t engage at school, with others, or with everyday tasks. And so you may start avoiding things. Avoid the party. Drop that subject. Ask for an extension on that assignment. Procrastinate. Run away every time you see a dog. Stop talking to that friend. Although these may lessen your anxiety in the short term, it is not every helpful in the long term. For example, if you keep avoiding parties, you’ll never actually learn that parties are not that scary but can be fun instead. And so my next tip is…

Strategy 2: Help them to understand the triggers for their anxiety
Whether it’s particular places, people, situations. They will know themselves best but you may also have some insight into their triggers. Have an open conversation with them about this. When or where do they physically feel anxious? Is it when an exam is coming up? Is it when a friend is upset at you? It may be helpful to suggest they keep a diary, detailing what’s happened in their day and when during the day they were feeling anxious. They can try to make some links and put these events into categories (e.g. school, friends, transport). Then, they’ll know their triggers better. And when you do know your triggers…

Strategy 3: Help them to engage in the things they’re avoiding in a supported way

Whether it is a party or an assignment, or a particular friend. Avoidant behaviour grows anxiety, because when we avoid something, our feelings of anxiety go away. And so they learn to keep avoiding that thing. Or, to put it into another way, they never really learn whether the thing we were originally afraid of is that scary, or something we can’t cope with.
So gently help them to engage in some of the things they’re anxious about. Get them to start small. This will make them feel more confident and independent. By challenging themselves to confront the things they’re avoiding, they give themselves the opportunity to see if those things will actually turn out the way you expect them to. Get them to think of it like an experiment where they’re testing their thoughts and worries. They may also want to write down what they expected to happen, and what actually happened. What you were they going to do? What did they actually do?

There are some things that would be helpful for them to avoid though…

Strategy 4: Avoid caffeine, alcohol and drugs

Physically, not so great for their system. Caffeine will keep them overstimulated and make them feel buzzed, whereas alcohol will have the opposite effect. Talking about liquid intake…

Strategy 5: Help them to take care of themselves
Make sure they’re eating 3 healthy meals a day. Run a hot bath for them. Get them to listen to their favourite music or read a book. Get out and exercise with them – go for a walk, a jog, join the gym together or do something you can enjoy together. This provides both exercise to refresh the mind and an opportunity to connect with them. As you do things with them they may open up to you further about their anxiety. And sleep. We cannot underestimate the value of sleep. Growing teens need 7-8 hours every day.
You could also come up with a list of activities you enjoy, that push you out of your comfort zone a little. That may be going on a hike, a marathon, chess club, going to an 18th, 21st, scuba diving, filming a video, writing music, going to the beach, having a surf. Or something things you may not enjoy as much, for example, doing the dishes or cleaning your room.
Or if that’s a little too scary for now…

Strategy 6: Write all your worries down in a journal

Start journaling. Let your thoughts out and vent. ‘This happened today and then I thought__ and it made me feel ____ and so I’m scared that ____ will happen, and she probably thought that ___. What if ____ happens? What will I do? I don’t know’. Sometimes it’s helpful processing your thoughts and worries externally. Get it all done in one go. Set aside 15 or 30 minutes a day (let’s say 5pm etc.) where you’ll just journal and worry your worries. And after you’ve done that, you’re done. You don’t need to worry anymore. And if you still find yourself worrying, go back to your journal until you feel you’ve let it all out. This includes if you have trouble sleeping. When you feel like you’ve journaled enough, put it in another room, or a cupboard in your room where you can’t see it. Because sleep is sleep. It may also be helpful to read through your thoughts another day, and reflect on what that day was like for you, and whether you still feel the same.

Strategy 7: Practice mindfulness

When we are in an anxious state, we tend to overthink the future and ruminate over past mistakes. Therefore, it is sometimes a struggle to remain in the present. It becomes a struggle to engage with class, or a conversation with a friend, when we don’t live in the here and now. And so mindfulness is a helpful skill you can practice, which helps you come into the present. You can use your 5 senses: focus on 5 things you see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can physically feel, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. Or you can direct your focus on one thing in the environment for 5 minutes or so, whether that be a desk, tree, clock, leaf. Keep focusing until you feel as though you’re now in the present.

Strategy 8: And breathe

Practice some deep breathing. Try to slow down and breathe from your diaphragm instead of your chest. Feel your stomach go out as you breathe in for 5 seconds, and your stomach go in as you breathe in for 5. And between breathing in and out, hold your breath for 3 seconds.

Strategy 9: And lastly, get them to talk to someone

That person might be you, but as a parent we all know that our teens might not want to talk to us about certain things. Get them to talk to someone they trust. Sometimes they need to vent to someone else and let it out. Someone that can understand them, and give them a clearer perspective on their thoughts and feelings. It might be a family member, a friend, a teacher, or church or community member or…Get them professional help.

Jing Jiao is a psychologist at Armchair Psychology, located in Sydney’s Eastern suburbs. To book an appointment with Jing or one of our other friendly psychologist contact us.

If you want to speak to someone about the grief you are experiencing please get in touch.

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source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/managing-teen-anxiety/

Establishing a successful workplace wellbeing strategy can pose challenges, as the concept of “wellbeing” varies from person to person.

Amanda advises that the most impactful workplace wellness endeavours incorporate positive psychology methodologies to facilitate constructive shifts. Such measures enable employees to alleviate stress and bolster their resilience, ultimately culminating in a more vibrant and healthy work atmosphere.

For further insights, delve into Amanda’s recent piece featured in HR Leader, emphasising the significance of these initiatives to enable employees to grasp and navigate their mental health more effectively.

The post Wellness initiatives in the workplace appeared first on Armchair Psychology.

source https://armchairpsychology.com.au/wellness-initiatives-in-the-workplace/